Underwater photography

Don't you just love a good picture? Ive spent the afternoon checking out the pics on a friend's website. He has promised me to add some shark pictures he has as well (Ive seen 'em, and I will make sure he keeps his promise, - cause those are some F'ing good pictures).
I have added the link to the site over there ---->

But just to make it easier for you, I will hand feed it to you right here (on a silver tray even): http://www.gislesverdrup.com/

Enjoy!

Potatoes and traveling

”So…” You say. ”Where the F[insert obscenity] have you been?”-“And where the F[repeat obscenity] is my annual postcard?”

“Well…” I say while moving my right foot vicariously across the asphalt, pushing the gravel on top of it into little piles. “I meant to send you one…but I just never got around to do it. I was too busy.”

-“Im really sorry…” I quickly add.

Im not lying when I say I have been busy. For some reason unknown to yours truly, the summers get shorter and shorter every year. I had so many things I needed to do, - although I cannot for the life of me remember those things at the moment…So you ask “What DID you do?” And I tell you to shut the fuck up (why bother with censorship?) and let me do the talking…or typing…or whatever. I DID work…made some money that I spent on traveling, -which I will get back to later. I moved into a new apartment,-which I guess is the main reason why I haven’t been able to update this mess called a blog. I didn’t have any internet access for quite some time…”But you could have used an internet café or something like that” you interrupt.

This is the part where I slap you with the student newspaper I am holding in my left hand. You look surprised but you let it go.

Yes I could have used a café, but this is where the busy part takes over. When you spend most of your day at work or moving boxes from one side of town to the next, a puter is not the first thing on your mind when you are done….the bed is. Besides…whats the point of updating a blog when nothing new has happened in your life?

“But you could have written another one of those meaningless entries you always write” you say. I just shake my head. You are starting to get on my nerves…

So…back to my summer. The best part of it I spent with my friend Beat (lets just call him Beat to protect his privacy…between you and me; I think he is on the run from the law) and his family. Before I got there however I had a 26h travel from Norway to the US…and on the way I had to explain at least 4 times what a bottle of Aquavit is...(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Akvavit). I also had to convince an immigration officer that I was NOT going to Idaho to marry some potato-farmer and that I was in fact going back to Norway after 10 days. “But there’s nothing to see in Idaho! People don’t go to Idaho…they go to California or New York…Chicago even!” I had to bite my tongue and try not to laugh…Laughing at an immigration officer is a sure ticket back to where you came from…

After a delay in Minneapolis I finally got to hug the Beat and his youngest daughter who hugged me despite the fact that I looked like crap (probably smelled like it too). Bless her heart. Summer couldn’t have started better.

I never saw the immigration officer again…but if I had, I would have told him that Idaho has a lot to offer. You can climb sand dunes and burn your feet. You can look for snakes and other creepy stuff in the bushes. You can go to the horse tracks and win money on a horse that no one believes in (Go Bruneau!), you can fly rockets and loose ‘em in a cornfield, you can go to the drive-in and the Flying M (great coffee) and you can go to Hailey and listen to music and eat at diners.-Even party a little. But most of all you can relax and unwind…forget about the stress that is waiting for you at home. If you’re lucky and get to hang out with people like Beat and his family as well, you’ve really hit the jackpot! The sweetest family you can think of has its base in Idaho…the secret is out.

So its safe to say the immigration officer was wrong. I personally think he should be fired. For most foreigners the immigration officer is the first American they speak to upon their arrival…and he or she should be a representative for Americans in general. To have such an ignorant dork behind the Plexiglas is a shame…I should have told him to get out more often…The air must be pretty thick in that glass-booth. Next time I will hand him a bottle of Aquavit and tell him to come see me in Idaho when he gets off work. Who knows…maybe I can marry him and get a green card...Potato-farmer my ass…

I hope you had a wonderful summer as well. And I promise you next year I WILL send you a postcard.

Bronzing issues

"Summer finally arrived! I still cannot believe it. Not only am I done with my exams for the semester, but as soon as I finished, the weather changed from rain to sun as well! And those of you who live in Norway where I live know that this is a big deal. No one in the world talks about the weather as much as we do here in Bergen. We are used to rain, and so whenever the sun pops out, people fill the streets and you wont find a single available table at any of the outdoor restaurants/bars. We Norwegians know the significance of a cold beer on a hot day. -And we prefer to drink it in company with at least another 3 cold beers."

I wrote this last week...all happy and giggly...But I didnt get to finish it, so I saved it as a draft...And now I dont want to finish it. This is how summer is right now...and how it usually is:



I dont know what I did wrong...but summer seems to have left me.

But I am optimistic! Fortunately I am going away this summer, and from what Ive heard, its supposed to be sunny there...so we'll see...maybe I'll even get a tan! That has been one of my dreams for quite some time...You see, whenever there is sun, I turn pink. I am a firm believer in genes and heritage, and I believe that my forefathers were evolutionary adapted to snow and cold weather. Its not that long ago since Norway and most of Scandinavia was covered in ice...roughly 10 000 years ago if i remember it correctly (that would be about the time Hugh Hefner was born)...and if you live by hunting in a snowy landscape, it will be a benefit to you if you are very pale...So its not really my fault that I am a pale person...its in my genes. My great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-etc grandparents survived during the ice age because they were pale enough to sneak up on dinner....and hence, my genes believe its a benefit to me to be pale. I have tried to convince them otherwise...tanning lotion, sunbathing, tan-colored stockings...but nothing works. I am and will always be a pale or pink person. I guess if I spend a lot of time in the sun I do eventually get slightly tanned...but Im the only one who notice.

I do however think its better to be pale than lobster red. I had this poor girl in the store the other day...she looked like she was wearing a strawberry-red sweather, when she was infact wearing a sleaveless top...and ofcourse the top had to be pastel yellow, just to intensify the red skin. I cannot imagine how painful it must have been to go to bed that night...ouch! Wherever you are my dear lobster-girl. I hope you are doing well. My thoughts are with you.

I have been a lobster-girl myself once. Not a complete lobster though, but partially...chest and buttocks. Dont ask how i managed to burn both my chest AND my ass, but I can tell you as much as it included a deserted beach, a bored boyfriend and a big pile of sand. A burned tush is not comfortable...and definately not sexy once the skin starts peeling...but it was a kick-ass sandcastle! (What did you think we were doing?) Rhodes is a beautiful island, no doubt about it.

In fact, all of Greece is beautiful, and right now I wish I was laying on a greek beach with some greek God-looking fellow rubbing me in with sunlotion...His name should be Marcus....or Flavio...no wait; Zeus... Zeus should be with me right now, rubbing my aching muscles from yesterdays workout...feeding me grapes or something. But alas, Im stuck here, on midsummer night alone with the rain pouring down outside. Maybe I should go out in the rain and dance around the bonfire like everyone else...but no. I think I'll put on a good movie and pop some corn. After all, rain doesnt have to be that bad. It gives you an excuse to do nothing. And no one will judge you for being pale. - You cant get tanned in rain.

I guess the rain can stay. For now.

My granny and Bruce Willis

No, my grandmother is not dating Bruce Willis...If you're an employee of the National Enquirer, you may click the "back" button on your browser now.

However, my grandmother digs Willis. She loves to travel and refuses to join any seniors club because she doesn’t want to "hang around a bunch of old people all day". She has always been into action movies, and her favorites include any movie that has a car-chase involved,- or a big explosion. Now you may wonder how old she is... I could be an 11 year old kid talking about my grandmother who is 40 something in which case this whole situation would not be of much interest. Im sure Bruce Willis has tons and tons of fans that are 40 something...infact, I know he has...but I am not 11 years old. Lets,-out of respect for my dear granny, just say that she is past 65.

Last night I was having dinner with my parents and my grandmother, and after a couple of glasses of wine, she suddenly started talking about Willis. She was telling me what a man's man he is and how tough he looks. Now, I am not someone to disagree about Bruce being a handsome fella, I like the guy, I love his movies (which I have ever since my grandfather told me to watch Die Hard 2 many years ago),- and I figured my grandmother was just saying these things because she had heard me talking to my sister earlier about his upcoming movie '16 blocks' which hits the theaters here next week.

It wasnt until she started talking about one of Bruce’s movies, that I realized she was in fact talking about Willis because she really likes his acting. She told me about this movie she had seen many many years ago, where Bruce was running around on glass...and he was bleeding...and being vulnerable. And she told me that was the moment when she really took a notice to him, - and how she had 'kept an eye' on him ever since. The movie she was talking about was of course the first Die Hard, -to those of you who are from another planet, and this sparked a whole conversation about classic action hero’s and movies. It was eventually decided that Die Hard was the most believable of the big action flicks of the 80s while “the Terminator is of no interest, and Rocky cant speak properly”.

I dont know many people of my grannys generation who love action movies...but Im thinking I should take her to the theater next weekend and watch 16 blocks. After all, not everyone gets to have such a cool granny.

Exam season (not to be confused with spring)

The shattered water made a misty din.
Great waves looked over others coming in.
And thought of doing something to the shore
That water never did to land before.
The clouds were low and hairy in the skies,
Like locks blown forward in the gleam of eyes.
You could not tell, and yet it looked as if
The shore was lucky in being backed by a cliff,
The cliff being backed by a continent;
It looked as if a night of dark intent
Was coming, and not only a night, an age.
Someone had better be prepared for rage.
There would be more than ocean water broken
Before God's last Put out the Light was spoken.

Robert Frost


Yes you guessed it correctly! I am studying for my Oceanography exam...and I am very bored...-and uninspired. 2 weeks and 2 exams to go before I can start enjoying this season called summer. I hope those of you who are also studying, are doing better than me.-May A's flourish!

Ive updated the photoblog with some pictures from the constitution day..that will have to do for now. I have to go be a good student...or atleast try.

Happy summer to those of you who dont go to school. -And dont get lost or sick in India to those who get to travel soon.

Spring and creatures

Spring has finally come to Bergen.

I realized this the other day when a confused and groggy bumblebee crashed into my forehead. Ive always been amazed by bumblebees...their anatomy does not suggest they should be able to fly. But they really are cute...especially right after they've woken up from hibernation. I have no idea how many times Ive had to duck or jump to the side, just to avoid frontal collision with a bumblebee. They fly wherever they want, whether you are standing in their way or not. -Not because they are arrogant, but because they have no idea how to turn.

Wasps on the other hand are vicious and evil creatures, put on the planet to terrorize happy and content human beings drinking lemonade and ice tea in the heat. Although I have to admit Ive never been stung by a wasp...-as far as I know... I still fear them. My baby sister had a nice plan for saving the world as a kid. She was about 2 years old and decided she could de-wing all the wasps. She would pluck their wings off when they were resting in the shadows on the ground in the middle of the day...sometimes she would amputate their legs as well...Surprisingly enough she only got stung once, for which she mumbled; "ouch" while looking at her finger. Tough kid indeed. Although her plan clearly failed, it was a good initiative.

Along with the bumblebees and the wasps, the warm weather also brings out my archenemy. The queen of all feared beings (for me anyway); the spider . And I am at this very moment looking at the mother bitch of all spiders outside my window...Many have wondered why I have such an irrational fear of spiders but I have been through ordeals that most will never experience, and few realize how lucky they actually are in life...I have never been bitten by a spider, I honestly dont think we have many species that do bite in Norway, although I know we have a few, cause my high school teacher told me about a time he got bitten and his hand swelled up...but personally I have never physically been scarred by a spider. Mentally however is a different story.

I was tortured once.

It was my second year at the university. I had zoology as a chosen subject and we were at an excursion that took place over 5 days. I thought it was going to be a nice trip with forest hiking and sunbathing by the fjord, but in reality we were shipped off to a zoology concentration camp...

5 students were packed into one room with one tiny bathroom that had a shower over the toilet. Breakfast was every morning from 7-7.30...and if you were late, you could kiss goodbye to lunch, as lunch had to be made during breakfast. The entire day from 7.30 to 5pm was spent in the field…be that a forest/meadow/salt march etc...which would have been nice, had it not been for all the slave work we were forced to do. At 5pm we would return to the camp, and we (if we were lucky) had 30 minutes to get ready for dinner (imagine 5 students fighting over a toilet shower....6 minutes each). Dinner would end at 6-6.15 and thats when the real torture started. Thats when it happened...what made me so afraid of spiders. We were forced to spend the next 3 hours staring into all 8 eyes of different spiders and draw them and determine species. The first time was ok....the second was ok...but after having stared into the eyes of several individuals at a period of 3 hours each day for 5 days...You will get scarred. You will have nightmares. You will never be the same again...

I thought I liked spring...now Im not so sure anymore. I think what I need is a personal spider squasher...and by that I mean a man.

Happy spring everyone.

http://www.bumblebee.org/

Spring outside my window