The True Purpose of Facebook

Facebook...Lets just taste that word for a bit. Its wide and open, yet round in the edges...and slightly bitter.

Unless you've been on a space mission...or are one of those really old people who refuse to follow the continuing industrialization of modern time, you've heard of it. You may have read about it in the paper...or watched a TV show where it was mentioned...You may have heard it from colleagues at work or perhaps someone mentioned it once at the gym. If you are really into the technical stuff, you may even have tried it out. To satisfy your curiosity and all that jazz.

Personally I cant remember how I got involved. I think maybe it was one of those "all-my-friends-are-jumping-off-of-bridges,-so-I-should-too" incidents. Cause we all know I do everything my friends do. I have no backbone. Or nose bone...or whatever it is called...(depending on what country you are from). No will of my own. None whatsoever *cough* excuse me. Either way, I got involved. I decided to check it out and I am now deeply fascinated.

I always thought it would be one of those 24-hour flu things. Shows up when you least expect it, knocks you out and leaves you all confused and vulnerable within a day or two. But somehow it stuck. And has stuck for what I believe is almost a year now.

It all begins with a profile. You load a profile picture, preferably of yourself, but anything from your dog, a beer can or some picture of a child no one knows seems to be working ok as well. Somehow profile pictures tend to look like mug-shots anyway, so I cannot for the life of me understand why people choose their child's face as their profile picture...each to his own I guess.

Then you answer a couple of grueling questions like; your name, your hometown, sex (you only get to choose between female and male...they seem to have forgotten the simple 'yes' and 'no' feature), birth date, and political as well as religious views. Once you get these done its over to the serious stuff ('cause everyone knows politics and religion never leads to anything serious). You give out your contact information, your relationship status, what you are looking for relationship wise (here you can actually choose the somewhat desperate line: "whatever I can get"), education and work info and eventually also your interests...books, movies, favorite quotes etc etc. In essence; you give your life story in the shape of a not so anonymous questionnaire.

Once you've done this, you can add other people to a 'friends'-list. These people can now read all the information you have in your profile, they can write you messages on your 'wall' and send you links and pictures and little 'gifts' in the shape of a cartoon picture. You want a garden? You can add it. Complete with cartoon plants to water and nurture. You want a puppy? You can have one...or an aquarium. -With mermaids.

What fascinates me about this whole ordeal is the purpose. What in the name of Alice ("who the fuck is Alice") is the purpose? Why do we do this? Why do I continue doing this? I originally thought it would be a nice way of getting in touch with lost friends. I would add them to my friends list and perhaps write them a message on their wall. You'll get a message back saying something like; "Hey, how are you? Long time no see. What are you doing these days?" And thats about it. You dont really get in touch with people...the people I leave messages to are people I normally see in real life as well. I dont really have anything to say to people I havent talked to in 5-10 years. Not because I have anything against them...but because we have nothing in common.

And then you have the people who add other people to their 'friends'-list just to get a high total number of "friends"...Why? Do they collect people? Why add people to the list of who gets to read up on your life, if you dont know them? Ive gotten add-requests from people I cannot remember ever having met! Im thinking they know someone I know and therefore automatically believe we have met at some point. Well, think again! I find it strange...

Ive come to realize that Facebook is not a way of getting in touch with lost friends as originally stated...It is a way of spying on people you used to know but no longer have contact with. "Oooo she married that guy she cheated on her boyfriend with." "Oh, he is single again." "She has 3 kids already?"

And in a way it is fun. To make up for the spying you wish someone a happy birthday when facebook gives you the notice...and all in all you know they are spying on you too, so it is ok. Being aware of it though makes it possible to put certain people on a limited profile list. Meaning they only get to read the stuff you allow. And if you are reading this while also being a name on my 'friends'-list...wondering why you only get a limited profile...Please dont be upset. Dont be hurt. It is not because I dont like you. There are seriously few people in this world I do not like...and I certainly would not have added you to any list if you are one of those few people. It is just that I like to know who are spying on me. If you only get a limited profile, its because I feel I dont really know you...or perhaps never actually did.

-Which defeats Facebook's original purpose...I know. But I like to play by my own rules at least once in a blue moon...and if you know me, you'd already know that.

So I guess I will keep checking in on my "friends" to see who they hooked up with last weekend or what movies they've seen recently, knowing this is just a new form of gossip. But at least it is open and both ways...and the source is you and no one else.